Justice secretary Michael Gove has a lot on his plate at the moment, what with leading a government department and a campaign to exit the EU.

So it is understandable his football knowledge is not as sharp as it could be.

Gove was ticked off by House of Commons speaker John Bercow at the start of last week’s justice questions for not sitting with his ministerial team. Bercow wondered aloud whether the lord chancellor was ‘lurking in the shadows’.

When Gove did shuffle up to stand behind the dispatch box, he used a football analogy to tell MPs he was confident in his ministers, saying he had the equivalent of ‘Arteta, Oxlade-Chamberlain and Ozil’ behind him, and was ‘happy to be on the subs’ bench’.

For the uninitiated among you, the three named individuals are players for Arsenal football club, but the comparison is not necessarily flattering.

Playmaker Mesut Ozil was nominated by his peers as one of the players of the season, but the other two have had less than glorious campaigns.

Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain has lost his place in the team to 19-year-old Alex Iwobi, and has been linked with a move away from Arsenal, having made 22 league appearances this season, scoring just one goal.

Mikel Arteta (pictured) has played just 15 times in the league in the last two seasons having suffered a string of injuries. He too is set to leave the club this summer.

Obiter would be intrigued to know which of his ministers Gove sees as the underachiever, and which he sees as the crock.

Topics